We are constantly imposing the belief that the presence of constant, strong relations is the key to a happy life. Are people who deliberately choose life outside the couple are more unhappy than those who divide the shelter with a partner? Sociologist Bella de Paolo believes that this is nothing more than an illusion.

Myth first: they just can’t find a couple

It seems to many that lonely people do not have a personal life and they dream of meeting a loved one. Polls conducted by American sociologists in 2005 and 2010 showed that more than half of the loners are by no means striving to create a family. Most of those who want to remain free already had experience in family life and subsequent divorce. Divorced men expressed great readiness to marry again than women’s married women. However, those representatives of the stronger sex who had excellent relations with friends and family were less enthusiastic about the idea of marriage.

I perfectly understand people for whom life alone is a conscious choice, because I belong to them myself. We do not intend to change something in our life. We were by no means disappointed in love and are not afraid to be rejected. These stereotypes have nothing to do with us. We love our lives alone and want to decide for ourselves how much time we need to communicate.

Myth second: they suffer from loneliness

You most likely read in the mass media that people in marriage feel happier and live longer. However, the allegations that those who do not have a couple are less happy, have no grounds.

In the study of the University of Michigan, a group of subjects for 8 years asked how happy they were. Those who were alone, and then marriage, felt more joyful in the first year after the wedding. However, after this time, the majority returned to the previous level of self -awareness and were just as happy or not as before marriage. This concerned only those people who were not going to get divorced. Those whose hopes did not justify themselves felt much more unhappy in marriage, up to the moment of divorce. Later they needed a rehabilitation period in order to reached the same level of spiritual well -being again as before marriage.

Myth third: they have the worst health

In a national study of Americans conducted last year, 82.9% of married respondents noted their health as a good or excellent. This is no doubt a very high level. However, let’s see how we are doing, supposedly unfortunate and sick loners? Among those who have never married and live without a partner, 81.6% called their health excellent or good. As you can see, the difference is extremely small. The fact that married people live longer confirms only one classic study in which the group of subjects was interviewed throughout their lives since 1921. All works of the last decades show that the matrimonial status does not affect life expectancy.

Myth fourth: they are selfish

Loners are often drawn by spoiled children who cannot be rely on. They are not used to taking responsibility and think only about their interests. Against their background, family http://onehavengroup.com/2023/07/16/buy-cheap-kamagra/ people are represented by reliable friends, attentive relatives and responsible workers.

One of the recent studies of the University of Pennsylvania refutes this myth. Married couples, as it turned out, paid much less attention to their elderly parents than loners. The latter not only more actively took care of the older members of the family, but also talked with their brothers and sisters more hunting. They helped friends and neighbors more often. Thus, while the married people focus exclusively on themselves and children, the lonely are more open to the world and other people.